the office
yo...moveabletype went all 730 on me and purged everyone that had signed up for notification after may 31. I'm sorry. please sign up again if you're so inclined.
theraflu is some awful awful shit. it just tastes nasty. it smells good, but tastes like chalk and pixie stick powder ground up into hot pee pee. or like that really cheap bootlegas (haha, see what happens when I'm delirious, I intentionally make cool amalgams like bootleg + bodega = bootlega) ass koolaid - except that shit isn't even called koolaid, its like "powdered juice drink" or something which, if you think about it, sounds like something to stay away from unless you're an astronaut. whatever works, though...the first week on a new job is not the time to get sick. I saw it coming though; christopher hasn't been well and it doesn't take but one miniscule, microscopic semblence of a germ to get me sick. and never mind, this shit doesn't even smell good, it smells like plastic gloves. eau de plastique gloves. I'm doing nothing to stop myself feeling nauseous. hold me.
so my desk is right next to the kitchen. they stock the refrigerator with snapple and pop and starbucks frappachinos; the drawers stuffed with cheez-it and fritos bags...goldfish...pretzels. everyone up in this bitch should be fat with the junk they have just all kinds of free for the partaking. the key is to concentrate as not to be swayed, but everytime someone goes for a frappachino I swear I want one. its like chocolate milk for the grown and sexy. I partook.
in any case, its a bit of an uneventful day. I am combing through the websites we maintain, getting familiar with file structure and coding idiosyncrasies. feeling way too emotional. trying not to fall asleep. I'm not bored I'm just dumb tired...last night I attempted to get caught up on my work outside of the steady gig, but I was easily distracted and wired and upset. when I finally did convince my insides to slow down in preparation for that mattress, my throat started to burn and ache. blah...point o' the story is: sleep much I did not. dumb tired I am. also, talking like yoda I seem to be. when I'm this tired I can fall asleep at any given time very quickly and in pretty much any position. I can fall asleep for about two minutes and wake-up again remembering an entire dream I'd just had. I did that shit a few minutes ago but I can't remember anything in particular about the dream other then like a flash of a piece of it, like a smear. don't you hate that? when you only remember one minute detail like "camouflage panties" and know the dream had to have been good but its gone forever? drat.
I walk pass rocco's 22nd everyday to and from work. now until TLC, I think it was, played a day full of "the restaurant" episodes (I love marathons; they also recently got me into "what not to wear"...that bitch stacey london is a riot and she always says "shut up" like old girl in that movie "mean girls" does), I had never even seen the show. but after like 8 episodes I got a little hooked. anyway, when I was walking home yesterday afternoon past the restaurant, they have a table set up outside - two pseudo-important looking suits were sitting there discussing something earnestly...I recall thinking "they look important like they're about to have a fascinatingly important business meeting...hey it would be dope if jeffrey chodoroidnfaodifn (whatever) or rocco dispirito himself just waltzed up in this piece". no sooner did I think it when here comes rocco crossing my path no more then ten feet in front of me talkin about "hey!" (to the suits, not to me). I fuckin got star struck. this coming from someone who's met phylicia rashad, spike lee, lynn whitfield, mary j. blige...I got star struck over rocco's ass. eh sue me - he's much taller then I thought and very good looking. skin all glowing like a neutrogena commercial; can't believe kid is pushing 40 years old. I shoulda said hi. anyway can you believe it...it was almost like I'd thought it into existance. as I continued my stroll I thought it'd be dope if a million dollars rained out of the sky directly onto me, too, but...I guess luck like that can't strike twice in one day.
this is the longest day in the history of earth. I wish I was more acquainted with what everyone was working on so I could chip in more; but things like that come with time. maybe another couple weeks before I really feel like I belong here, like I'm needed. in the meantime I will devour every inch of their scrumptious network servers until I know how everything works and where everything is located. I will keep taking bathroom breaks so my legs don't fall asleep (the soap in there smells like cabbage patch dolls...that sweet, synethic baby powdery sort of smell...c'mon if you had a cabbage patch doll you damn well know they smelled so good you wanted to lick them). I will be attentive. I will not get sick. I will bring a sweater tomorrow so my nipples don't turn into thumbtacks.